Clarkson – Driving.co.uk from The Sunday Times https://www.driving.co.uk Car news, reviews and advice Driving.co.uk team Wed, 19 Apr 2023 10:40:43 +0000 en-GB hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.2.3 https://www.driving.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/sites/5/2016/08/cropped-st_driving_icon.png?w=32 Clarkson – Driving.co.uk from The Sunday Times https://www.driving.co.uk 32 32 200474819 Jeremy Clarkson: BMW M3 Touring is best way for your dogs to find out what 0-62mph in 3.6sec feels like https://www.driving.co.uk/news/clarkson-bmw-m3-touring-is-the-best-way-for-your-dogs-to-find-out-what-0-62mph-in-3-6sec-feels-like/ Wed, 19 Apr 2023 10:39:15 +0000 https://www.driving.co.uk/?p=127254 When Jeremy Clarkson tried to learn the Nürburgring Nordschleife — the fearsome 13-mile circuit in Germany comprising more than 150 turns and 1,000 feet of elevation change — in the late 1980s, he did so behind the wheel of a BMW M3 E30. Even with a top instructor on hand to break down sections of […]

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When Jeremy Clarkson tried to learn the Nürburgring Nordschleife — the fearsome 13-mile circuit in Germany comprising more than 150 turns and 1,000 feet of elevation change — in the late 1980s, he did so behind the wheel of a BMW M3 E30. Even with a top instructor on hand to break down sections of the circuit into bite-sized chunks, it was “like learning everything Mozart ever wrote. While being frightened half to death by a lion,” according to the columnist and TV star.

But while he found the track mystifyingly complex, was inexperienced behind the wheel in those days, and the racing-car-for-the-road E30 was a bit much for him to handle, he’d love to return to the track today with the latest M3… or more specifically the G81 M3 Touring he reviewed for The Sunday Times Magazine at the weekend.

Clarkson had already driven the M3 saloon and loved it, including the dafter gimmicks, such as “the way you can do a big oversteery skid and the car marks you for how good it was.”

But with the M3 package added to the Touring estate car body for the first time, “your dogs can get to find out what 500 horsepower feels like and what it does to the pit of your stomach when you go from 0-62mph in 3.6 seconds,” according to Clarkson. In case that’s something a dog has ever wondered about.

However, there is a drawback, because “the rear quarters are carpeted, which could make clearing up the sick tricky.”

Some reviewers reckon the estate body reduces the M3’s structural rigidity, Clarkson notes, but he doesn’t agree and instead called the Touring version “the real deal”.

“It’s a complete gangster, but it’s a Guy Ritchie gangster. It’s eloquently violent. Elegantly deranged. When it kicks you in the groin, it’s wearing a Church’s brogue.”

Clarkson added that the beauty of the new M3 Touring is the electronics on board, which can make it as docile as you like when not trying to break lap records. “If you push a lot of buttons it can become as sensible and as corduroy as the Volvos that, in the 1970s and 80s, made Britain the estate car capital of the world.”

What’s more, he reckons it’s prettier than the saloon; a “tremendous-looking car,” in fact.

Considering all of the above, Clarkson concludes, “Why have an ordinary saloon with an ordinary boot when you could have so much more, with no discernible downside?” Other than the potential for having to clean dog sick out of carpet, that is.

Actually, Clarkson does point out a few other niggles in his review. At £86,365 it’s expensive, he reckons, and the dashboard he describes as surprisingly bland. He also admits the ride can be “a bit sudden” even in Comfort mode. But everything else about the M3 Touring is “sublime and moreish and wonderful”.

Having spent time with the BMW M3 Touring, and knowing what he now knows about oversteer and how it can be savoured, Clarkson would love to go round the Nürburgring in it. “Unlike the original M3, I’d enjoy driving it there and back as well,” he concluded.

To read more about Jeremy’s Nürburgring adventure, and his 2023 BMW M3 Touring review in full, head to thetimes.co.uk.

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Jeremy Clarkson calls Lexus NX plug-in hybrid an ‘affront’ to cars in classic rant https://www.driving.co.uk/news/jeremy-clarkson-calls-lexus-nx-plug-in-hybrid-an-affront-to-cars-in-rant-about-modern-motoring/ Sat, 08 Apr 2023 23:01:00 +0000 https://www.driving.co.uk/?p=126779 If you are a fan of white goods you’ll love discussing the Lexus NX450h+ F Sport, reckons Jeremy Clarkson in his review of the plug-in hybrid mid-sized SUV. But for the world’s best-known motoring journalist it illustrates everything that’s wrong with modern cars. In his write-up for The Sunday Times Magazine today, the columnist and […]

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If you are a fan of white goods you’ll love discussing the Lexus NX450h+ F Sport, reckons Jeremy Clarkson in his review of the plug-in hybrid mid-sized SUV. But for the world’s best-known motoring journalist it illustrates everything that’s wrong with modern cars.

In his write-up for The Sunday Times Magazine today, the columnist and Clarkson’s Farm star likens Lexus’ mid-size SUV to his fridge-freezer, with a similarly incomprehensible (to him) vernacular that comes with it. Recharging the NX450h+’s battery takes just 2.5 hours using a 230V/32A connection and the 6.6kW on-board charger, he points out.

Clarkson also helpfully lists some of the stats related to his kitchen’s Liebherr IXCC 5155 Prime BioFresh NoFrost, which has “a hefty GTIN, a premium GlassLine inner door rack, a 70-litre freezer compartment and, even when taken to the max, an energy consumption of just 181 kWh/a.” Fascinating stuff.

Of course, this isn’t the first time The Sunday Times’ in-house agriculturist has slated a hybrid car, but Clarkson’s two-star review cuts particularly deep.

If the way the plug-in hybrid system works disinterests Clarkson, the way the doors function is far worse, he argues. Rather than fitting handles, Lexus has opted for buttons on the outside and inside that are used to unlatch the doors electrically, which is a problem in inclement weather.

“Push [the button] and nothing happens. So you push it again. Nothing happens again. Then a bus goes through a puddle and splashes you — I was in Manchester, so it was raining — and then a cyclist shouts at you for being in the road. And eventually you push it again. And nothing happens again.”

That wasn’t the only time Clarkson had issues getting inside the NX, apparently, as he adds that he was also locked out while loading the car up ahead of the trip up north. With the keys still inside the car, the small battery used to start the NX’s four-cylinder petrol engine had run flat, meaning the doors wouldn’t open.

Lexus NX 450h+ door handle

“Eventually, having got the boot open using swearing,” he wrote, “I climbed over the back seats, which was not comfortable, retrieved the keys, climbed back out of the boot and used a proper car — my old Range Rover — to jump new life into the crappy little battery.”

If getting in was frustrating at times, so too was getting out, Clarkson wrote.

“You push what looks like a handle but it isn’t a handle. It’s a switch. And it’s supposed to open the door. But if sensors detect an approaching cyclist, the door stays shut. And as there’s always an approaching cyclist these days, you have to assume that once you arrive at your destination, you will be stuck in the car until 4am.”

Lexus NX 450h+ door handle

He also criticised the other touch-sensitive buttons around the cabin, which aren’t really buttons “because that’s so, like, old-fashioned”, and the beeps the system makes when you press them. He critiqued the accelerator pedal, too, saying it “doesn’t feel as though it’s connected to the engine,” and the safety system that “yanks” at the steering wheel if you dare to get too close to the white lines.

All that aside, Clarkson did have some kind words for the NX, calling it “a pretty decent long distance companion. Quiet, smooth and extraordinarily economical. If my maths are correct, and they usually aren’t, we achieved 65mpg.”

2023 Lexus 450h+ F Sport interior

But he questioned whether such a thing is really necessary, because those seeking cheap or clean transport can “get a bicycle or a train.”

“The NX is a Prius on stilts, an Uber taxi with a fancy nose job,” he concluded. “And to me, it’s not just filled with annoying electronic idiosyncrasies and rubbish door handles, it’s an affront, because it is just a white good that has exactly the same charisma as my fridge-freezer.”

The future will involve other drivers in cars like the Lexus NX “sitting there trying to work out how to shut down [their] infernal lane control” while he comes up behind in an old Triumph Dolomite Sprint, “its little single-cam engine buzzing away and its 16 valves chattering like a flock of geese at a drinks party …

“I’ll switch off my overdrive and tear past wearing a smile so bright you could use it to illuminate a medium-sized city.”

To read Jeremy Clarkson’s review of the 2023 Lexus NX 450h+ plug-in hybrid, head to thetimes.co.uk.

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Jeremy Clarkson has driven the Land Rover Defender 130, and he’s not a fan of its looks https://www.driving.co.uk/news/jeremy-clarkson-has-driven-the-land-rover-defender-130-and-hes-not-a-fan-of-its-looks/ Sun, 26 Feb 2023 00:01:00 +0000 https://www.driving.co.uk/?p=124902 Jeremy Clarkson doesn’t much care for the looks of the Land Rover Defender 130, describing the stretched 4×4 as “a very odd-looking car” and “not even on nodding terms with the concept of pretty”. In his review of the eight-seat Land Rover for The Sunday Times Magazine today, the columnist and Clarkson’s Farm star lamented […]

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Jeremy Clarkson doesn’t much care for the looks of the Land Rover Defender 130, describing the stretched 4×4 as “a very odd-looking car” and “not even on nodding terms with the concept of pretty”.

In his review of the eight-seat Land Rover for The Sunday Times Magazine today, the columnist and Clarkson’s Farm star lamented the fact that while the five-metre long Defender offered some useful extra space, the increased distance between the front and rear wheels hadn’t done much for its visual appeal.

Despite those qualms, however, he still found plenty to like about the 3-litre six-cylinder mild-hybrid version of the car he tested.

The Defender 130 drove well, he said, lacking the diagonal pitching he experienced when testing the short-wheelbase Defender 90 model — something he put down to the 130’s air suspension.

He also liked the performance of the petrol engine under the bonnet even if it felt like  “conspicuous and unnecessary consumption”. A diesel version would represent a better option, he suggested.

“As it’s not a sports car and you’re never going to drive it like your hair’s on fire, you may as well go for the diesel.

“And if anyone accuses you of using the fuel of Satan, tell them it’s a sort of hybrid and then they’ll have to shut up. Or tell them you voted Labour. Same thing.”

Although he found little to fault the Defender 130’s driving experience, Clarkson was less complimentary about its interior, which he reckons isn’t as pleasant a place to be as that of the Volvo XC90.

The eight-seat model “would be a nine-seater,” he wrote, “if you could specify the front-row jump seat that’s available on other, shorter models, but this would then make it a minibus and you’d have to pass a test in weirdness before being allowed to drive it.”

Helpfully, he sought to clarify that point.

“I’m not saying all minibus drivers are weird. Just most of them.”

Land Rover Defender 130 interior

The seats are amply spacious enough for eight adults, he said, though he found the middle row of seats so complicated to fold down that he abandoned the task.

With all eight seats in the upright position, Clarkson found the boot too small to accommodate a couple of Labradors — “I know, I tried” — and concluded that like the rest of the current Defender line-up (and most unlike the classic Defender range), that the 130 was unlikely to be much use as a practical workhorse.

“You need to think of it as a rival to the increasingly excellent Volvo XC90. Except for the interior trim.”

“The Volvo feels Swedishly cool and stylish, whereas the Land Rover feels dark and foreboding. And the trim is nowhere near as tactile. Let’s be kind and say they were going for a functional look.”

In the end, Clarkson awarded the Defender 130 a creditable four stars out of five, praising its “smooth and serene” drive, but not being quite so enamoured by its looks, its gloomy interior or the model’s £74,000 starting price.

Read Clarkson’s Land Rover Defender 130 review in full at thetimes.co.uk.

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Jeremy Clarkson describes Lotus Emira as ‘pretty special’ in Sunday Times review https://www.driving.co.uk/news/jeremy-clarkson-describes-lotus-emira-as-pretty-special-in-sunday-times-review/ Sun, 12 Feb 2023 00:01:00 +0000 https://www.driving.co.uk/?p=124025 The Lotus Emira is “pretty special” and represents surprisingly good value for such an accomplished sports car — so says Jeremy Clarkson in his latest review for The Sunday Times Magazine. Clarkson explains that he has long been a fan of the Lotus brand since first seeing one on television as a small boy, driven […]

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The Lotus Emira is “pretty special” and represents surprisingly good value for such an accomplished sports car — so says Jeremy Clarkson in his latest review for The Sunday Times Magazine.

Clarkson explains that he has long been a fan of the Lotus brand since first seeing one on television as a small boy, driven by Diana Rigg on The Avengers.

The 1960s Elan “was a tremendous car and really cast the mould for Lotuses to come,” wrote The Grand Tour and Clarkson’s Farm star, adding: “It was light and dangerous and unreliable and fun. Basically Kiefer Sutherland with headlamps.”

So too did he “adore” Lotus’ long-lived supercar, the Esprit, despite the company’s reputation for ropey build quality.

Lotus Esprit V8

In its final guise (Jeremy’s favourite), the Esprit was powered by a turbocharged V8 engine, “so you got hours of turbo lag followed by a terrifying burst of adrenaline and speed and noise, and all the time you were sitting there thinking, ‘Is this steering wheel going to come off?’”

With his fondness for the Norfolk brand in mind, he was keen to get behind the wheel of Lotus’ latest offering, the 400bhp supercharged Emira, due to be the firm’s final petrol-powered car before it transitions to being an electric-only brand towards the middle of the decade.

“I’d heard good things. My neighbour Harry [Metcalfe] from YouTube bought one and kept making squeaking noises when I talked to him about it. So I was very excited when I learnt I could borrow one over Christmas.”

Lotus Emira in yellow, side view studio

Sadly, having been struck down with an illness over the festive season, Clarkson didn’t get a chance to road test the Lotus quite as extensively as he might have liked, but added that “you don’t have to go far to realise it’s pretty special.”

Clarkson admitted that despite having become something of a proficient driver over the years, the fact that the Emira came equipped with a manual gearbox (automatic transmissions are available) left him scrabbling about like a learner driver for a little while before getting back into the swing of things, so out of practice was he and so rare in a sports car an old-fashioned stick-shift has become.

“It was like reacquainting myself with a landline,” he wrote, with the Emira leaving him “kangarooing away from junctions and stalling on hills and swearing.”

Yellow Lotus Emira on the road, rear 3/4 view

Once getting the hang of it, though, Clarkson soon realised that despite supercar looks it is actually a proper sports car — a rival for the likes of the Porsche 718 Cayman GTS.

Performance he described as “brisk, but it doesn’t tear your skin off. It’s a fun speed, a sports car speed.”

That nippy pace is down to the Emira’s 3.5-litre V6 engine, which is one of two options and found — in non-supercharged form — in some versions of the Toyota Camry saloon. It’s probably not the one to go for, he reckons.

“Yes, it’s been supercharged,” he wrote, “but it doesn’t make an especially good noise and can at times be a bit recalcitrant to get going. In the fullness of time you’ll be able to choose a four-cylinder AMG engine and I’ve a feeling it may be a better bet. Cheaper, too.”

The handling managed to live up to Lotus’ vaunted reputation and in Clarkson’s eyes exceeded the capabilities of other models from the firm, so often cited for their handling prowess.

Yellow Lotus Emira cornering

“I know people get all wistful and interesting about the way Lotuses go round corners, but I’ve never really understood why. Even the Elise, regarded by many to be the best-handling car of all time, was awfully understeery if you really gave it the beans. And when I learnt that more than 60% of the Emira’s weight sat over the back wheels, I figured I’d be in for more of the same.”

His preconceived notions about the Emira, however, happily proved incorrect.

With a “pointy” front-end, Clarkson was able to slide the Emira’s rear out a little bit without too much effort, again affirming for Jeremy the model’s sports- rather than super-car credentials.

Underscoring this was the “no-nonsense” interior devoid of supercar fripperies such as quilted leather and hand-stitched door panels and which occupants can access easily “even if you’re tall and a bit fat.”

As frill-free as the Emira’s interior may be, it’s still quite a bit more comfortable and refined than in other Lotus models of yore such as the Evora. The Emira even features a 10.25in central infotainment screen and Apple CarPlay and Android Auto as standard.

With prices starting from £75,995 (the AMG-powered version will be “significantly” less), Clarkson felt that the Lotus offered tremendous value for money.

“You could have three for the price of one scum-spec Ferrari.”

With the Emira, then, “Lotus has proved with this car that you can build something amazing to behold and perfectly serviceable for the price of an ordinary saloon.”

Read Clarkson’s review in full at thetimes.co.uk.

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Jeremy Clarkson finds Range Rover Sport no match for its big brother when it comes to carrying his shotgun https://www.driving.co.uk/news/jeremy-clarkson-2023-range-rover-sport-review/ Tue, 10 Jan 2023 12:58:47 +0000 https://www.driving.co.uk/?p=123044 As a means of transport for the well-heeled farmer nothing at all, says Jeremy Clarkson, comes close to a full-fat Range Rover — not even its harder-edged sibling, the Range Rover Sport. Writing his column in The Sunday Times Magazine at the weekend, the Clarkson’s Farm and The Grand Tour presenter said that when it […]

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As a means of transport for the well-heeled farmer nothing at all, says Jeremy Clarkson, comes close to a full-fat Range Rover — not even its harder-edged sibling, the Range Rover Sport.

Writing his column in The Sunday Times Magazine at the weekend, the Clarkson’s Farm and The Grand Tour presenter said that when it comes to ferrying logs, dogs, shotguns and “fat men in tweed shorts”, the Range Rover is simply unmatched.

“It’s like an iPhone. I know you can buy other devices but you don’t, do you, because the fact is they’re not as good,” said Clarkson.

Notorious reliability issues and ease of theft notwithstanding, Jeremy is an ardent devotee of the Range Rover, currently owning two — a battered old one for farm work and a fourth-generation model, which is currently used by girlfriend Lisa Hogan as a daily driver. He recently looked into replacing the latter, but was shocked at the prices of the all-new model.

“I wanted another Range Rover because I adore them. Until I saw that prices for a well-specced one with a proper engine [read: a big V8] start at about £130,000. I was amazed. So amazed that I thought I’d better have a look instead at the new Range Rover Sport.”

But Clarkson found the Sport rather lacking in nous when it came to off-road countryside pursuits when he took it to a game shoot.

2023 Range Rover Sport interior

“Sure, it had all the buttons that can be pressed to tailor the car for the prevailing conditions, but there wasn’t a setting that enabled it to deal with the combination of big, fat, low-profile tyres and wet grass. So I spent the day slithering about like everyone else.”

When Driving.co.uk editor Will Dron took his previous-generation Range Rover Sport PHEV off-road in 2021, he had a very different experience and the car proved eminently capable, even on standard tyres. It did break down on the M4 heading home afterwards, mind you.

Clarkson was even less impressed with the new Sport’s boot, which he said isn’t wide enough to accommodate his 12-bore shotgun. An issue to which we can all relate, we’re sure.

The deal-breaker for Clarkson, though, was the lack of a split-folding tailgate.

“It means that when you’re out and about there’s nowhere to sit,” he wrote. “And as you stand there with your back throbbing and your knees begging for mercy, you’ll realise that you’ve bought second best.”

Boot tailgate: 2022 Range Rover review by Will Dron from Driving.co.uk at The Sunday Times
The split tailgate of a 2022 Range Rover

The Range Rover Sport was more Cheshire than Chipping Norton, he concluded.

“Unnecessarily heavy, unnecessarily tall and unnecessarily thirsty. Sure, the V8 in the new Sport will average about 24.5mpg, which is remarkable, really, but imagine how much more you’d get if the car weren’t so … big.”

There were good points, though. The Range Rover Sport’s on-road performance, for example, with “amazing” handling.

“You can happily stick it into a bend knowing that a billion algorithms will happen to make sure you don’t come out on the other side on your roof.”

The sheer supercharged pace, too. “You get 523 horsepowers, which means you can get from 0 to 62mph in less than five seconds, and then keep on going all the way to 155mph.

“But if you do that you won’t get 24.5mpg. Instead you’ll get a call from some seismologists in California asking what on earth you’re up to. And if you wouldn’t mind stopping.”

It should be pointed out, however, that despite Jeremy’s attempts to cross-shop the two, the Range Rover and the Range Rover Sport are not in fact, natural rivals.

As Clarkson himself notes, there is a significant price disparity between the two vehicles; entry level Sports start from around the £80,000 mark, with “basic” Range Rovers from just shy of £100,000.

Specifying a “proper” engine puts the price of the Sport to closer to £100,000 and the bigger Range Rover to well over £130,000.

Despite that eye-watering price tag, Clarkson said the Range Rover was still the only option that appealed to him, regardless of the few items of merit he found in the Sport.

“It may be a good car, and I’m sure it’ll go down well in the footballing suburbs of Britain. But you have to know that if you buy one, or any of its rivals, you didn’t buy the real thing. Certainly I think I’m going to have to do that, unless I can find one to steal.”

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Jeremy Clarkson’s five best and five worst cars reviewed in 2022 https://www.driving.co.uk/features/jeremy-clarksons-five-best-and-five-worst-cars-reviewed-in-2022/ Sun, 25 Dec 2022 07:57:00 +0000 https://www.driving.co.uk/?p=122553 It’s difficult to see how Jeremy Clarkson fits car reviewing into what is clearly a manic schedule. On top of running a farm, farm shop and restaurant (on and off… mostly off), while filming it all for TV and writing about it for The Sunday Times Magazine, he has still had time this year to […]

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It’s difficult to see how Jeremy Clarkson fits car reviewing into what is clearly a manic schedule. On top of running a farm, farm shop and restaurant (on and off… mostly off), while filming it all for TV and writing about it for The Sunday Times Magazine, he has still had time this year to create another special episode of The Grand Tour and write his regular columns for the main sections of two national newspapers.

But on top of that Clarkson is still producing car reviews for The Sunday Times Magazine – 19 throughout 2022, in fact. It would have been more but, by his own admission, he’s been so flat out that he failed to notice at least two test cars that were delivered to him this year.

A look back at all 19 shows that, unlike in previous years, Clarkson hasn’t deemed any of the cars he’s reviewed to be real stinkers; the lowest score awarded between January and December is three stars. He only wrote about one electric vehicle all year, and you’d think that came in for a beating, but surprisingly it received four stars and was one of his favourites.

There’s just one car he decided was worthy of a full five stars, despite having driven Porsches, Ferraris, Maseratis, Lamborghinis, McLarens and Mercedes (no, it wasn’t one of them). Read on to find out what is was.

Jeremy Clarkson’s least favourite cars of 2022

Mercedes-AMG E 63 S estate

  • Published January 9, 2022
  • Rating ***

A V8-powered luxury Mercedes AMG estate? Surely this would have been right up Clarkson’s alley? Well, he liked quite a lot about it, including the vast boot, its speed and the way it flowed from corner to corner.

But because the electrics started going wrong, including one incident when the driver’s seat kept moving forward on its own, crushing him against the steering wheel until he looked “like Stanley Tucci towards the end of that movie The Core,” Clarkson concluded he couldn’t trust the Merc and refused to drive it again.

Read ‘A big boot? That’s what I’d like to give it’ at The Sunday Times website.

Lexus ES 300h

  • Published January 30, 2022
  • Rating ***

This review was Clarkson at his most forlorn, seemingly resigned to the idea that speed and fun are no longer priorities in motoring, as people now prize comfort and efficiency above all else. He referred to the hybrid “Lexus ES Something or Other” saloon as “a Prius in a businessman’s suit”, describing its performance as “not even on nodding terms with the concept of speediness.”

However, he admitted it’s exceptionally comfortable and the build quality is so good that “If ever I need a pacemaker I will ask Lexus to make it.” Ultimately, he added, “in a world full of ecomentalists and speed cameras and righteous cyclists waging an all-out war on motoring, its quiet, grey anonymity does make a deal of sense.”

Read ‘A Prius in a suit — and not in a hurry’ at The Sunday Times website.

Kia Sportage GT Line S 1.6 T-GDI Hybrid

  • Published May 29, 2022
  • Rating ***

The tone of melancholia continued in May with his review of Kia’s hybrid Sportage. A double winner at The Sunday Times Motor Awards 2022 the Sportage may be, but the popular family SUV failed to win over Clarkson who complained of a lack of speed and handling thrills:  “To drive? Who cares, really? No one who’s interested in a Korean SUV, that’s for sure.”

Noticing the proliferation of USB ports around the cabin, including in the sides of the front seats, he concluded: “This … is a car where everyone can be connected, so who cares that it takes about a year to get from 0 to 60?”

Read ‘If it’s got enough USB ports, nobody cares if it accelerates like a tortoise’ at The Sunday Times website.

Volkswagen T-Roc R

  • Published August 7, 2022
  • Rating ***

Clarkson was handed the keys to the hot version of VW’s “Golf on stilts”. The regular T-Roc compact SUV makes sense for a young family, he said, as it’s well built, “funky and modern” inside and fits three children in the back. But the 300bhp T-Roc R makes much less sense, Clarkson argued, because the lowered, stiffened suspension makes the driving experience “a spine-jarring, teeth-smashing bag of awfulness.”

And he pointed out the price, which with the optional extras fitted to his test car was £51,320. “Who’d pay that for what, when all is said and done, is a medium-sized MPV?” Clarkson wondered, especially when you could buy the Golf R instead.

Read ‘What’s the point of a family car that smashes your teeth in?’ at The Sunday Times website.

Vauxhall Astra

  • Published December 18, 2022
  • Rating ***

Clarkson starts this review by wondering if anyone has ever really dreamt of owning a Vauxhall, even the fast ones; the implication being they’re among the least desirable cars on the road. And the new Astra he was given to test had a three-cylinder, 1.2-litre engine that, in his words, makes it just about able to beat a Citroen BX diesel away from the lights.

But its “ordinariness” appealed to girlfriend Lisa, who didn’t want to get out of the car all week, it seemed, which Clarkson decided must be why Vauxhall continues to exist as a brand. “Boring sells. Look at The Archers. Look at cornflakes. That’s what the Astra is: cornflakes.”

Read ‘A dream hatchback for cornflakes eaters’ at The Sunday Times website.

Jeremy Clarkson’s favourite cars of 2022

BMW M5 CS

  • Published February 27, 2022
  • Rating ****

This could have received five stars, as at one point Clarkson pointedly agrees with the people on the internet who argue that it is the best BMW M5 ever.

The 2022 CS didn’t quite make that mark, though, for three main reasons, according to Clarkson: its “gearbox wanted to remain in Greta mode a bit longer than I’d have liked”; the V8 engine could have been noisier; and you can’t actually buy one — the limited production run of 2,200 examples was even cut in half, and “No one seems to know why.”

But of course, Clarkson was won over by the “slayer-of-worlds” 635 horsepower (“What a rush”), the motorsport cornering sophistication even on bumpy, potholed roads, the familiar carbon-fibre-clad interior and the understated exterior.

Read ‘Could this be the best Beamer ever?’ on The Sunday Times website.

Porsche 718 Cayman GT4 RS

  • Published April 24, 2022
  • Rating ****

The Cayman GT4 RS has the engine of the 911 GT3 in a smaller package, and Clarkson likes that. He also likes the fact that it’s ludicrously loud … “Not on the outside, mind. Only for those who are in it. Take note Jaguar, who do it, wrongly, the other way around.”

The balance, suspension set up and other mechanical trickery mean that this is, according to Clarkson, a car you can “literally fling around the place and, like all good sports cars, it reacts like an excited puppy. Squealing and wagging its tail and making barking noises.” And it’s one you’ll never want to get out of, he reckons.

The catch? Prices start at £108,000 and, because this is Porsche, “you’ll be expected to pay extra for the seats and the paint and ‘Oh, you want a key as well?’”

Read ‘Meet the noisy neighbour that everyone seems to love’ on The Sunday Times website. And check out how Driving.co.uk got on with this car here.

Ford F150 Lightning

  • Published October 23, 2022
  • Rating ****

Clarkson is famously not a fan of electric vehicles (“A car without an engine has no soul”), but Ford’s big battery-powered pick-up truck won him over. How? Well, 260 miles of indicated range isn’t terrible, he reckoned, given it’s so big that “you drive it from a seat that’s so far off the ground, you can look down on passing airliners.” And it can carry a ton, tow four tons and accelerate as quickly as a Ferrari F40.

What’s more, he argued, “it is quite exceptionally quiet and refined”, has a “Ford Focus-sized boot under the bonnet” and comes with a yardstick built into the tailgate because “they never forgot that the people who buy one will want to measure a log at some point.”

It’s size is ridiculous on Oxfordshire roads, and amazingly renders it too big to drive around his farm, but despite being “stupid”, Clarkson wants one. Or maybe because it’s stupid?

Read “I’ve fallen in love with an electric pick-up truck” on The Sunday Times website.

Alpine A110 S

  • Published May 8, 2022
  • Rating ****

The best thing about the Alpine A110, according to Clarkson, is that despite having the engine in the middle, it’s “not a plonker’s car”. This, he wrote, is because it’s so small, and therefore not threatening. “The young men of Abu Dhabi will not be going around Harrods till three in the morning in one of these, that’s for sure.”

But Clarkson also liked the raspy exhaust, the “tight and sharp and dreamy” sensation of driving it, and that the 296bhp S version still isn’t supercar-fast, which means you don’t get nervous behind the wheel. Despite being stiffer than the regular A110, the S was never uncomfortable, he added.

The only problems are that if he wanted a sports car he’d get a convertible, and because James May owns a standard Alpine A110, Clarkson couldn’t admit that it’s good in his co-presenter’s presence.

Read ‘James May is right to love this car — not that I’d ever tell him’ on The Sunday Times website

BMW M4 Competition M xDrive

  • Published February 27, 2022
  • Rating *****

A BMW M4 should be rear-wheel-drive, according to Clarkson, and perhaps the styling “is a bit off”, but other than those two quibbles he really couldn’t find anything to fault this car and awarded it five stars – the only model to receive the full complement this year.

It was remarkably composed downhill on black ice, for a start, which meant Clarkson avoided the same fate as several drivers who smashed up their cars at the bottom of the road. He went on to find the twin-turbo straight-six engine smooth and sonorous, and its 500+ horsepower to be the perfect amount: “Any more renders a car too scary to be much fun most of the time.”

According to Clarkson this G82 M4 Competition M also has: “the best seats ever to envelop my nether regions”; 90% of the drama of early M cars with “10,000 times” the refinement; two “perfect” driving modes that you can switch between via a button on the steering wheel; steering so good “it’s like you’re being pulled around on God’s apron strings”; an infotainment system even he could operate; and rear seats and a boot that are genuinely usable.

“It’s possible this will be the last M4 before electric drive takes over so I’m glad to see it going out in such style. Not with an especially large bang … but with a satisfied, arms folded, post Sunday lunch sense of a job really well done,” Clarkson concluded.

Read ‘This Beamer has me beaming ear to ear’ on The Sunday Times website

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Jeremy Clarkson asked girlfriend to crash Honda Civic hybrid into tree after she did so with a Jazz https://www.driving.co.uk/news/jeremy-clarkson-asked-girlfriend-to-crash-honda-civic-hybrid-into-tree-after-she-did-so-with-a-jazz/ Mon, 28 Nov 2022 14:58:48 +0000 https://www.driving.co.uk/?p=121832 The actress Lisa Hogan, partner of Jeremy Clarkson and co-star of the hit Prime Video series Clarkson’s Farm, has escaped injury after crashing a Honda Jazz test car into a tree. Clarkson had borrowed the Jazz from Honda UK but before he’d got into the car, “someone who shall remain nameless (save to say she’s […]

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The actress Lisa Hogan, partner of Jeremy Clarkson and co-star of the hit Prime Video series Clarkson’s Farm, has escaped injury after crashing a Honda Jazz test car into a tree.

Clarkson had borrowed the Jazz from Honda UK but before he’d got into the car, “someone who shall remain nameless (save to say she’s called Lisa Hogan),” reported Clarkson in his review of the Civic eHEV for The Sunday Times Magazine, used it to drive to the farm’s on-site shop only to forget “to stop turning the steering wheel after the corner was over.”

Although the tree that Hogan hit wasn’t a big one the crash still caused considerable damage to the supermini, stoving in the roof and necessitating its removal on the back of a low-loader lorry.

Clarkson had borrowed the Jazz to test the latest version of the car that had converted his late mother, Shirley, to Honda ownership, and to report back on one of the latest offerings from the company which he believes, despite decades of soaring success, has seemingly begun to fade from the British consciousness.

Because of the crash, however, Clarkson didn’t manage to get very much time behind the wheel before the Jazz was carted away to be replaced by Honda’s new hybrid Civic.

His first impressions of the Civic weren’t positive, he said, describing it as “possibly the dreariest-looking car I’ve ever seen.”

2022 Honda Civic e:HEV

His apprehension was further  heightened by the sight of the “e:HEV” badge on the rear denoting the Civic’s hybrid powertrain.

Although Clarkson has lavished praise on a couple of hybrids of late (namely the Ferrari 296 GTB and McLaren Artura), he has in the past been extremely critical of “electrified” cars.

“Naturally I asked the nameless person if she’d like to drive this into a tree as well, to put it out of my misery, but she declined.”

While he may not have been enamoured by the looks or the fact of it being a hybrid, when it came to everything else he was rather impressed.

Driving the new 11th-generation Civic, Clarkson was “tickled by not being tickled at all,” such was smoothness and refinement of its ride.

2022 Honda Civic e:HEV

“I know the roads round my house and I know that many of them are quite bumpy. But in the Civic I couldn’t feel any of the irregularities at all. It was like being in a hovercraft, only with steering and nice seats and controls that make sense,” he said.

Even the Honda’s hybrid system came in for praise. It primarily functions as a series hybrid, using a 2-litre petrol engine as a generator to send energy to the battery and motors but it can, when required, send power directly from the engine to the wheels.

Despite the Civic’s clever economy-minded engineering, Clarkson found it to be a willing and rewarding unit for the driver.

“If you want to go really quickly you can put it in sport mode and then, as you get to the red line, there’s an artificial but hilarious motorcycle soundtrack that will make you want to stretch it to the limit in the next gear as well.”

This is despite the fact that the Civic utilises a form of continuously variable transmission (CVT) with which gear changes are largely seamless, though according to Jeremy, it felt less like a CVT and more like a conventional automatic gearbox.

Also worthy of note was the Civic’s spaciousness and build quality, both of which Jeremy found exemplary, saying that the Honda was “built to a higher standard than almost anything else in the world, including the machines they use to do eye operations.”

“With prices starting at less than £30,000,” he said, “it’s cheap as well.”

“This Civic e:HEV — such an ugly name — is almost certainly the best option there is for people who need a car. Rather than want one,” he concluded.

“It’s as though Honda has realised that in the sensible times that lie ahead, people will need a sensible car.”

“I’m going to stick my neck out now and say that if you are looking for the last word in comfort, and you can’t afford an S-class Mercedes-Benz or a Rolls-Royce Phantom, this is your best bet. It’s uncanny. And quite brilliant.”

Read Clarkson’s review of the Honda Civic e:HEV in full at thetimes.co.uk.

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Jeremy Clarkson would choose the McLaren Artura over a Ferrari 296 GTB https://www.driving.co.uk/car-reviews/jeremy-clarkson-mclaren-artura-review/ Mon, 14 Nov 2022 12:42:27 +0000 https://www.driving.co.uk/?p=121099 The McLaren Artura and Ferrari 296 GTB are similar cars in many ways, but when it comes to picking one supercar over the other, Jeremy Clarkson says he would plump for the McLaren — but it’s a close-run thing. Reviewing McLaren’s £189,000 plug-in hybrid in The Sunday Times yesterday, Clarkson, host of the Amazon hit […]

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The McLaren Artura and Ferrari 296 GTB are similar cars in many ways, but when it comes to picking one supercar over the other, Jeremy Clarkson says he would plump for the McLaren — but it’s a close-run thing.

Reviewing McLaren’s £189,000 plug-in hybrid in The Sunday Times yesterday, Clarkson, host of the Amazon hit shows The Grand Tour and Clarkson’s Farm, drew plenty of comparisons between the Artura and the Ferrari (which he recently reviewed) and, while he was unstinting in his praise for Maranello’s finest, the McLaren’s civility, less outrageous pricing and ease of use won it the toss.

The McLaren’s plug-in hybrid powertrain and its ability to drive in fully-electric mode, and therefore emit nothing from the exhausts for a time, made it an ideal steed for a recent trip to London from Clarkson’s farm in the Cotswolds. “But I’m burning any fuel” is a solid response in case he should be assailed for driving a conspicuous supercar by “pink-haired girls and vicars” — a reference to the recent spate of climate action protests.

McLaren Artura

“I could zoom down the M40 using the full force and ferocity of petrol and then, in the capital, I could push a button and run silently, like a summer breeze,” he wrote.

Things didn’t go quite to pan, though. In theory, the McLaren has around 18 miles of electric-only range but Clarkson couldn’t quite figure out how to use the engine to recharge the battery, which meant that by the time he got to London he had to make do with just four miles of range, which “in the real world is about two inches”.

Still, brief as his experience exploring the limits of the Artura’s hybrid system was, he was nonetheless impressed by it, and the fact that the transition between electric and combustion-powered modes was a lot smoother than that of the Ferrari.

“I flipped the switch and was plunged into a strange world. Because there I was in a car that’s all visual brimstone but that made no noise and had about the same top speed as a small horse.” [In fact, the top speed in electric mode is 80mph, as Will Dron pointed out in his first drive review of the Artura for Driving.co.uk.]

The 3l twin-turbo hybrid-assisted powertrain continued to shine once beyond the city limits, according to Clarkson.

McLaren Artura powertrain

“The figures say it will go from 0-62mph in three seconds and keep on accelerating all the way to 205mph. That’s very impressive. But what I liked even more was how that power was delivered. It was gentle. Delicate. And as a result, not scary. It must also be said that the engine sounds fantastic. Like a really fast farmyard auctioneer.”

The way the McLaren drives down a country road, he said, was “a dream” with the ride quality “just on the right side of tolerable”.

His only criticism of the driving experience was that the low-profile Pirelli P-Zero tyres, developed specifically for the Artura with clever heat and pressure sensors embedded within, produced an excess volume of road noise.

Inside the Artura, Clarkson found plenty more to like. Unlike in the Ferrari, the McLaren’s steering wheel isn’t festooned with confusing buttons — a very deliberate choice by the Woking firm.

McLaren Artura interior

The cabin, he added, is sufficiently spacious despite the car’s agreeably compact dimensions, making ingress and egress relatively painless, with the quality of the finish on a par with that of “a Victorian tunnel” (high praise indeed from Jeremy, a noted Brunel enthusiast).

Clarkson is well-known for his dislike of hybrid technology. In his review of the Ferrari 296 GTB he damned the technology with faint praise, writing that “Ferrari didn’t build [the 296 GTB] to be the best it could be — but built it to be the best current political thinking says it can be”.

It was a similar story with the McLaren, though the writer was still impressed with the engineering work that has gone into developing the Artura’s drivetrain.

“Make no mistake, the engineering in this car is very clever. The whole engine, electric motor and gearbox assembly is unbelievably small and the way they all work together suggests some witchcraft has been deployed.”

While he found the McLaren an easy car to praise, making a choice between it and the Ferrari was a lot harder.

On paper, the cars have some significant differences. Though the performance figures are comparable, the McLaren is quite a lot cheaper and less powerful than the Ferrari.

McLaren Artura cabin

“I don’t go with this tosh,” wrote Clarkson. “I’d never have been able to convince my mother that there were any differences between these cars at all. I can’t even see that many myself. Both have virtually flat, 120-degree V6 engines. Both have turbos in the V. Both have the same two-seat, mid-engined layout and both are delightfully little.”

He described the choice between the two as “tricky”.

“The Ferrari is more exciting but the McLaren is more civilised. The Ferrari is better looking and a bit faster. But the McLaren is noticeably less expensive and much easier to use.”

“Really,” he concluded, “I guess it comes down to who you prefer, Lando Norris or Charles Leclerc. And that doesn’t help either, as both seem to be good eggs. I’d take the McLaren but I wouldn’t blame you if you did the opposite.”

Read Jeremy Clarkson’s review of the McLaren Artura in full at thetimes.co.uk.

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Jeremy Clarkson’s review of the Ferrari 296 GTB hybrid is in — here’s what he reckons https://www.driving.co.uk/news/jeremy-clarksons-review-of-the-ferrari-296-gtb-hybrid-is-in-heres-what-he-reckons/ Mon, 31 Oct 2022 17:55:18 +0000 https://www.driving.co.uk/?p=120675 Like every other car maker on the planet, Ferrari has started embracing electrification. There was the LaFerrari hypercar with F1-derived HY-KERS hybrid tech, and then the SF90 Stradale plug-in hybrid. In 2025 we’ll get the company’s first pure-electric vehicle and by 2030, four out of every Ferrari sold will be hybrid or fully-electric. Fortunately for […]

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Like every other car maker on the planet, Ferrari has started embracing electrification. There was the LaFerrari hypercar with F1-derived HY-KERS hybrid tech, and then the SF90 Stradale plug-in hybrid. In 2025 we’ll get the company’s first pure-electric vehicle and by 2030, four out of every Ferrari sold will be hybrid or fully-electric.

Fortunately for petrolhead Jeremy Clarkson, whose hatred of family-focused hybrids such as the Toyota Prius is well documented, Maranello’s first efforts at electrification have been altogether different kinds of machines, with performance rather than fuel economy to the fore.

And as we know from his review of the McLaren P1 for The Sunday Times (and one of his TV programmes, probably), if a hybrid system can be used to induce “’Oh my God’, sweaty-pawed, heart-racing, wide-eyed, hair-on-end, ball-shrinking terror” then he’s not entirely against the idea.

So what of the Ferrari 296 GTB — the Prancing Horse’s first true production plug-in hybrid, and a car that Driving.co.uk and The Sunday Times voted Dream Car of the Year in our recent Motor Awards 2022? Well, Clarkson’s verdict for the Sunday Times appeared at the weekend, and it’s a mixed bag of opinions.

In powertrain terms, things are looking good. Equipped with a 3-litre V6 petrol engine and an electric motor, it produces an enormous 819bhp, all of which is fed to the rear wheels. There’s also a small rechargeable battery, giving you an official electric range of around 15 miles – although Jeremy reckons that figure drops to around 10 in the real world – and allowing short journeys to be completed without burning a drop of unleaded.

That might come in useful when petrol power is banned from town centres, Clarkson reckons, but those “eerie” silent journeys will have to be short. When the electricity runs out or the on-board computers decide the car is going too fast, the petrol engine steps in.

But it doesn’t simply step in, he says; it barges in with the subtlety of a volcanic eruption.

“In a normal hybrid, with a normal, quiet engine, you don’t really know what’s driving you at any given moment. But in the Ferrari you really do. There should be a light on the dash giving those with weak hearts a warning that, in a few moments, Vesuvius is going to blow up.”

Once the V6 has taken charge the 296 GTB can unleash its full might, and there’s certainly plenty of that. Getting from 0-62mph takes less than three seconds and the top speed is 205mph.

Clarkson claims that he doesn’t usually like “cars that produce more than 700 horsepower because they make no sense on the road,” but “this one delivers its power so smoothly and so righteously it makes you grin, not soil yourself.”

It’s not much like a McLaren P1, then.

He also heaped praise on the V6 sound (the 296 makes a noise like a “sad wolf”) and the handling. According to Clarkson, there’s no suggestion the car weighs around 1.5 tons and the steering is so brilliant he can’t understand why other car makers haven’t copied it.

The Clarkson’s Farm star even complimented the Ferrari on the quality of its ride, saying “it glides around like it’s running on linear air tracks” on fast roads, although country lanes make it feel a bit “hectic.” In short, Clarkson says the 296 GTB “felt like a Ferrari, and that’s the highest praise you can lavish on a car.”

But he also approved of the grown-up stuff. The seats, he says, are as “comfortable as being dead,” while the boot is more than big enough for its frame, and easy to climb into and out of.

2022 Ferrari 296 GTB

He did have some criticisms, of course. His “main issue” was with the controls, including the touch-sensitive switchgear on the steering wheel.

“I had to stop and reach for my spectacles because the steering wheel was festooned with many buttons, most of which seemingly did nothing,” he complained. “I know it’s important for Ferrari to give drivers an F1 experience but they’re too complicated.”

He also found fault with the appearance of his test car, which he said caused him to “burst out laughing.” Ferrari’s press demonstrator was finished in the classic red paint but it also came with “a massive blue stripe on the roof and bonnet. The rear valance was blue and so were the wheels, but the rest of the car was red. It looked absolutely ridiculous.”

After deciding to simply tell people the car belonged to his Grand Tour co-presenter, James May, Clarkson then turned his attention to the price, which stands at a not-inconsiderable £241,560, something he described as “steep.”

However, with options including the “hideous stripe” (£14,400) fitted to his test car, the total price came to just under £360,000 – almost twice the price of a basic McLaren Artura.

Despite all that, Jeremy’s four-star review described the 296 GTB as a “tremendous car to look at and drive.” He also praised the engineers’ efforts to hide the “hybrid madness”.

But Clarkson said there was a significant caveat: because the hybrid power is really there as a result of government policymakers, he said, “Ferrari didn’t build [the 296 GTB] to be the best it could be — but built it to be the best current political thinking says it can be.”

You can read Jeremy Clarkson's full review of the Ferrari 296 GTB at thetimes.co.uk

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Jeremy Clarkson has found an electric vehicle he actually wants to own https://www.driving.co.uk/news/jeremy-clarkson-has-found-an-electric-vehicle-he-actually-wants-to-own/ Mon, 24 Oct 2022 15:52:01 +0000 https://www.driving.co.uk/?p=120296 Jeremy Clarkson may freely admit to disliking electric cars but the battery-powered Ford F-150 pick-up truck proves he can still fall for an electric vehicle. The Sunday Times Magazine columnist has in the past professed his hatred for pick-ups in general, though appreciates that they are enormously popular — particularly in America. As he points […]

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Jeremy Clarkson may freely admit to disliking electric cars but the battery-powered Ford F-150 pick-up truck proves he can still fall for an electric vehicle.

The Sunday Times Magazine columnist has in the past professed his hatred for pick-ups in general, though appreciates that they are enormously popular — particularly in America. As he points out, Ford could bring in more revenue than Starbucks, McDonald’s or Coca-Cola simply by selling F-150s and nothing else.

As a result, Clarkson says the idea of an electric truck seems “ridiculous” – particularly in the oil-rich USA. There, he claims, opening the bonnet of a pick-up truck and finding an electric motor would be as disappointing as “undoing John Wayne’s zip and finding that his penis was smaller than a maggot”.

Even so, the fact remains that Tesla boss Elon Musk has announced an electric pick-up truck, and Clarkson suspects Ford executives had to sit up and take notice.

“To be safe, they had to make an electric version of the F-150,” he wrote in the magazine this weekend, “and it couldn’t be half-arsed in case Musk’s alternative wasn’t. It had to be not just brilliant but the best of the best of the best.”

Ford F-150 Lightning Platinum

The result is the F-150 Lightning, and despite the fact the F-150 (electric or otherwise) is not officially available in the UK, he managed to get hold of one and put it to the test near his Cotswolds home.

Instantly, Clarkson discovered issues on the narrow lanes of rural England. There, where the roads are better suited to Fiestas than F-150s, he found it difficult to pass oncoming traffic.

“I spent most of my time going backwards and then absorbing the hatred from the oncoming motorists, who were all thinking, ‘Why on earth are you driving something so big, you idiot?’”

And the F-150 Lightning is certainly large. Ford’s figures suggest immense bulk, including a width of eight feet, which, as Clarkson points out, makes the Ford just 3in narrower than a Scania HGV. And it’s tall. The seat is “so far off the ground you can look down on passing airliners,” he wrote.

Ford F-150 Lightning Platinum touchscreen

Clarkson also found fault with the Lightning’s navigation system and when he tried to test the vehicle off-road at his farm, the F-150’s huge size struck again. Attempting to access the “most challenging” land he owns, he found the track was too narrow for the big Ford to pass. Clearly it’s not a part of his farm he ventures down in his comically-oversized Lamborghini tractor.

But the F-150’s size wasn’t all bad news. Clarkson extolled the virtues of the “Ford Focus-sized boot under the bonnet” and the yardstick set into the load liner at the back – presumably to help owners who “will want to measure a log at some point.”

And he also praised the performance, which sees the Lightning get from 0-60mph in four seconds flat, making it “as fast as a Ferrari F40”.

Clarkson also noted the Lightning’s refinement and the sheer number of “toys” in the cabin.

Ford F-150 Lightning battery layout

These qualities — and no doubt the very fact that it is ridiculously oversized — have managed to melt Jeremy’s heart. Despite describing electric cars as “no more interesting than a deep freezer or a toaster”, he says a “pick-up truck is a tool and, frankly, I don’t really care what makes it move about.”

So, although he admits the Lightning is “stupid” and he has absolutely “no need” for a pick-up truck at all, he says he still wants one.

You can read Jeremy Clarkson’s full review of the Ford F-150 Lightning at thetimes.co.uk.

Ford F-150 Lightning Platinum specifications

PowertrainElectric motor, 131kWh battery
Power572bhp
Torque775 lb ft
Acceleration0-62mph: 4.0sec
Top speed112mph
Range / CO2300 miles / 0g/km
Weight3,127kg
Price$96,874 (£85,714)
Release datePre-order for 2023 in US
Jeremy’s rating★★★★☆

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